|
|
Well, I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. As some of you aleady know, Avi and I are back together after a hectic 4 days apart. Last Sunday, I was supposed to go with Mario and Audrey to go hang out at Tyler's for a small party he was holding but Avi told me to go his house first since Tyler and Mario would already be there. At that time, I was torn beyond belief and I was struggling to get to know another boy, but I agreed. I woke up and went to his house and with a racing heart, I saw him. He let me inside his house and I sat on his bed, trying to mask my vulnerable emotions when he softly asked me "So, you found someone else?" I wasn't too surprised to hear him ask since Mario had probably told him and I shook my head. "No, I only talked to him about normal stuff, nothing special." he then sat next to me and I noticed something wrapped in white paper sitting on his desk, addressed to me. I asked him what was it and got up to unwrap it. It was a small thing made of play-doh, an angel spreading her wings with 2 hearts, one with an A and another with a V carved on it and beneath it said forever. I felt all my emotions being released from their cage and everything came swirling in my head. He took me into his arms and he held me tight, whispering apologies, how he missed me terribly, how he was so mad and torn when I said I was thinking of getting someone else, but what he said last really got me. He said I was the one who brightened his life and...I was his angel. My eyes widened and I felt tears welling up in them, that's the first time he ever called me such a tender thing. He called me his angel. Before I knew it, I was bawling like a big baby, letting all my hurt and fears out with my tears. I wish he would call me that special name more often, it made me feel special and...I'm still scared.
| | |
|
I went to Travis's farewell bash at Maia's place and I'm so glad I went! I was the first to arrive so I found Maia and Travis there. We got ready for the party and everyone started pouring in: Sofie, her Matt, Chris, Cory, Casey, Cat, a friend of hers, and another Matt. Me, Sofie's Matt, and Travis duked it out playing Super Smash Bros while everyone else cheered us on. We munched on Cheetos, pretzels, and chips nonstop while drinking Pepsi and Mounain Dew. Matt (I dunno his last name) and I kept talking about fun stuff: he can be easily frightened while I love horror, he and I love video games but we're not obsessed, he loves the movie Spaceballs which is also one of my favorite movies, and he'll let me borrow all the Devil May Cry games since I've been wanting to play those for a good amount of time. He's cute and really nice! Sofie kept looking at me while I was yapping with Matt and was smiling and winking and I knew what she meant. I gave her the look that said "hey we're just talking but...he's pretty nice". Cat told me when Avi asked her out right after he broke up with me and she turned him down. I thought "Wow, he moves on quick". She and I talked about me and Avi's disastrous former relationship and Travis told me an little secret about one of the football games last year. I didn't go into the pool since it was fricking cold lol. But I'm glad I went, it allowed me to let my hair down after a very stressing week. It makes me even more determined to move on and find someone else.
Ja ne! ^_^
| | |
|
Great.... -_- ....I'm so lost all over again. Shit!
| | |
|
Well....he broke up with me. It hurt a lot but then again after I talked to my aunty it made me see that Avi's not worth it at all, he's a real fucking asshole who never really loved me or treasured me for all the shit he's done to me. So I just say "FUCK YOURSELF AVI!" I'm going to forget this child and get myself a real man who won't bitch about me trying to straighten a mature relationship, which obviously was "too much stress" for Avi. Oh well when I move to Orlando, I'll probably find the man right for me, who won't suddenly say I'm a pain in the ass. Avi's too immature to be in a real relationship since it would obviously would get in his fucking way in his precious magic cards and his video and computer games aaawwwww boo hoo. I know a part of him will always live inside me whether I like it or not and that will always have a special place in my heart since I do love him a lot but that doesn't mean I have to pin after that shmuck, who's a fucking 17-year old infant! My God, he thought he became a real man and so did I until he started behaving like a moping kid all over again -_-. Oh well time to strenghten myself and forget this chapter of my life. Thanx to everyone who were there for me when I really needed someone the most. I LOVE YOU ALL! 
Ja ne! ^_^
| | |
|
....oh God, help me....Avi's confused again about us and he's thinking of leaving me....and he won't tell what I did wrong besides me dream...my heart hurts and I'm scared....what did I do to deserve this?
| | |
|
|
